Purple Chalk Smiles and Summer Memories

The last memory of summer is imprinted on my window. As I approach my parked smoldering car, a vision of that most exhilarant night comes swimming back into my soupy thoughts. A beautiful reminder of shinning eyes bright with the radiant joy of youthful exuberance, nothing ever fades so quickly. But as the sun sets upon the heat of August, I almost cry as that lopsided purple smiley face stares back at me, its beamy little chalk eyes pentrating my hardened soul.And as I recall the times of our disolving summer; the nights we spent laughing deep into the night; the concerts and the lake trips and the neverending rummy games- I smile. 3 familiar faces materialize behind my tightly shut eyes, filling the empty spaces hiding between the memories that are already becoming stale from reminiscing much too often. Instantly my heart bleeds at the thought of letting go of our days in the sun. The realization that these beautiful moments will fade into the background of our busy Fall sends instant panic pulsing through my heart. And though for a while my bones will ache with the faint noise of stale laughter falling to the ground amidst the browning leaves, I know that nothing could ever replace these waning moments. As a single tear flits across my eyelashes and rolls fluidly down my flushed cheeks, I once again come face to face with that loaded symbol of my entire summer. The purple smile sits silently upon the tinted glass, glistening in the sun. And though it will fade and rain will come and wash its shining smile away, forever will its meaning be imbeded in my heart.


*Because nothing could ever replace these times-
                          
                                    These times we felt alive.

Flying

Create me in color. 

Soar across my life and teach me how to dance. 

Learn in me the ability to love with arms wide open. 

Laugh in my vivacious youth.

Trace my heart in distant air and sing me the soft lullaby of your vibrant life. 

Follow me through ornate lies.

I never imagined falling could feel so good. 

But look at me-

**I'm flying. 

Night Scribling

Isn't it funny how nothing seems to change as you go through the motions of your everyday life, but when you look back, everything is different? 


Nothing stays the same for long (or maybe not long enough). If I have learned one thing in my short time in this world, it is this. Oh, and that people make you who you are. Even if you don't realize it at the time. Or even ever. 


Some may argue that you are the only one who can dictate who you will become. I choose to disagree. The experiences you create with those you surround yourself with are truely what makes you into... well, you. And that is something worth consideration.


So chose your loved ones carefully, knowing ahead of time that you will find yourself within these relationships. Settle into a rhythm of life, soaking up every experience as you mold your heart into it's own beating pattern. And be thankful for them too. You could not be yourseld without them. 


But also know that change is enevitable. People may come and go, but in truth, you will always have the part of them that made you who you are today. And that's where I find comfort: Knowing that every memory can be held deep in the quiet of my heart as I shape my life into who I'm meant to be. 

Survival of the Fittest

Time has come full circle. 

I never imagined I would be who I am. This is neither good nor bad. I am not boastful of my short comings; I am not conceited in my acomplishments. I am simply content to be at this place and time, still (for the most part) in tact. 

I have always been excited for the future. I learned quickly how often the vast unkown can welcome beauty into the coldest of hearts. Now I wander and roam through this unmeasureable limbo called youth as time forges onward. It seems as if the exploration of minds has become my second nature. I guess you could call it a personality trait. 

But what happens when fear comes knocking?

August 2009. Petrified. Standing with a heart of stone- no one to turn to, nowhere to run. I quickly learned that time does not stop for hitch-hikers. It only accelorates at the face of fear. And though I'm hesitant to admit it, these road blocks are worth the present troubles. Sometimes the lessons learned on detours are what carry you through the rough pactches on the beaten trail. 

**And the memories made along the way are often worth the heartache.  

So just let it be. Let time persevere. Let life move you on with racing color. Let the wind rush past your aching soul. Learn to laugh at change. Hold your head high as your heart breaks. Accept bruises with an open heart. And know that oneday, it will all be Eh-OK(:

Because in case you haven't noticed, 

     out there- 

          

               It's survival of the fittest.